The past week has been busy, both on a work level and personal level. I covered a lot more hours with the baby while his grandmother was out of town. I’m happy with the extra money I earned but will say I didn’t enjoy the early mornings, long days or my RLS symptoms which were exacerbated by being more tired. Those earnings certainly do come with a price! Anyhow, the purpose of today’s post isn’t to complain about my physical ailments. Tough decisions are what has been weighing heavily on my mind.
On a personal level, my family has decided to move our dad to assisted living. The change will happen right after the holidays. We started him with in-home care a few weeks ago, and this will follow him to (as I like to call it) The Big House. He is currently getting physical, speech and occupational therapy. Initially, he also had nursing services, but we discontinued those as of today as his vitals are stable. Getting to this point with dad has been a process. Although I am the health care DPOA and legally didn’t need a family agreement, I felt it necessary. For my sister, it has been a grieving process. She could see the cognitive decline, but accepting it took time.
Once admitted to The Big House, we will then have six months to clean out his condo. I can’t say as that part will be fun, but at least we won’t need to deal with selling it. He is in one of those “continuing care” deals. Half of the condo’s value will go back to his estate, while the other half goes to The Big House. While to some it might sound like a ripoff, it isn’t. It is a non-profit group with exceptional care. It also guaranteed that even if his money were to run out, they would meet all of his needs, including nursing care. Our mom was in and out of The Big House for ten years, spending the entire last year of her life in nursing.
Another area of tough decisions is establishing my 2019 goals. Finishing paying off our baby step two debt is a no-brainer. What I’m struggling with is a timeline for completion, and then figuring out baby step three! Part of my struggle is my job which I know will end. The problem is I don’t know when! Then again, Hub’s income has been increasing, so there is that. He also made it his own personal goal to increase it even more in 2019. Go Hubs! He sure makes me proud. Adding yet more to my struggle is the need to establish a business goal. As I often do, I am likely overthinking things. One way or another, I’ll figure out some goals before the end of the year. I know if I don’t aim at something, I’ll hit just that…nothing!
How about you? Have you made any goals for 2019?
It sounds like you “kids” are taking good care of your dad. I’m sure it’s difficult.
I’m impressed that you are so far along on your 2019 goals. I’m still throwing ideas around, nothing formal yet.
Priscilla Bettis recently posted…“It was dark.”
Having worked in long-term care has come in very handy with handling a lot of these decisions. Still difficult being on this end of things though.
Keep thinking about your 2019 goals. We aren’t that far off from the New Year!
That’s very tough. The Big House sounds like an interesting set up with the assets/finances. I don’t think I’ve heard of something like that before. At least you have a good bit of time to clean out the condo. I’m sure you and your siblings will feel some relief to know he is being watched and cared for, after he gets moved.
These communities are an interesting setup. My parents moved into theirs close to 12 years ago. HERE is an article that explains what they are all about. The initial buy-in wasn’t cheap but sure has given us peace of mind that his (and our mom’s when she was alive) are met.
It is so hard to have to deal with so many different things, but you are doing a great job and what seems best for everyone!!! Our goals for this year, now that the IRS and my car are paid off are to get rid of ALL CREDIT CARD DEBT…..if we put our minds to it, we can do it this year so by January 2020, we are hoping to be completely DEBT FREE except our mortgage, and that will do down next…after some MUCH needed home repairs!
Thanks. It will be a huge relief when he is moved and we get his condo cleaned out.
You have done a fantastic job with your debt payoff this past year! Put your minds to it and get rid of that credit card debt once and for all! I know you can do it!
I’m sorry to hear that your dad has to move, but it sounds like it is a pretty good setup for him and for your family.
Woohoo – congratulations on the increase in income!
2019 goals: I’d REALLY like to pay off my student loan by the end of February. I also think we can reach positive net worth by the end of 2019.
Sadly it is one of those things that needs to happen.
I’m excited about the increase in the income. I think 2019 is going to be an excellent year!
Those are terrific goals for the coming year! A positive net worth is certainly something to strive for!
My parents called someone who did estate sales to get rid of every thing in their house when they went to assisted living. They picked what they wanted to take. The kids took a sentimental item or two and then the professionals had the sale and wrote them a check and nobody in the family had to do any cleaning or sorting. I highly recommend that as a real family stress reliever. Nobody is going to want much of a parents possessions except a couple of keepsakes. Just let a pro handle it.
My mom’s boyfriend did the same thing when he moved into an assisted living place. Had an estate sale. Made things very easy on him and his kids.
My brother and I were talking about this earlier today. As adult children, none of will likely want/need much. I think the thing that scares us the most is going through dad’s file cabinets and other papers. As for the other household items, I’m hoping my siblings will agree just to let someone come and get it. I have zero desire to deal with sorting this all out!
Congrats on the increase in income!!!
I’m sorry about your dad having to move, but it is wonderful that you all are making sure he is taken care of.
I have not yet figured out my goals for 2019, hopefully soon.
Thanks. I know the extra income will make a world of difference in our finances. Tough situation with my dad, but at his age, we are blessed to still have him with us.
Eager to read about your goals! 2019 isn’t far off!